The Singles Jukebox

Let’s all revisit Kat Stevens’ description, shall we…

[Video]
[3.20]

Alfred Soto: Thumping and strumming and tuneful, this assembly line collaboration strolled confidently into the British top two, and if we’re not careful it can happen to us.
[3]

Micha Cavaseno: World’s greatest living human being, poet Luke Davies, once remarked that Olly Murs looks “healthy and dim” and that he was “the sort of lad who would wear a waistcoat.” I don’t know what the implications of his wardrobe imply precisely, but I do find an amazing void buried beneath the mechanically “human” stomp and Demi’s lifeless yet “effort-dressed” vocals. More and more, pop gets that people like “Something Real” and this song has all the elements of being gussed up for an almost organic factory thud. Like, forget steampunk, imagine a factory made of river dams and trees or something.
[2]

Brad Shoup: It would seem that the recipe for palatable folk-pop is to find the least folksy people on the face of the earth.
[6]

Katherine St Asaph: A nonentity and an artist sanded down by the biz to match, duetting on genial chug-strum solely on grounds of X Factor connections and vaguely teen positioning. PURE SPECULATION: “Up” was written for One Direction, possibly soon after show’s end, but when 1D started angling for writing credits / paid enough dues not to have to do this sorta thing anymore, Murs got stuck with the song, its chorus hastily rewritten to “this love is moving in the same direction.” (I genuinely can’t tell anymore if this is more bullshit or plausible. Fucking Syco.) “Boy band music” is a nebulous category — much as One Direction will forever remain floppy-haired moppets to a certain group of people, R&B biting, classic-rock biting and Cheiron sound all get categorized as such by dint of the faces on the cover — and people love to call it the lowest common denominator, but be not fooled; musically (if not mathematically) speaking, there’s always lower.
[1]

Thomas Inskeep: Olly Murs has made some interesting genre-crossed pop songs before, but this ain’t one of ’em. This could be a Jason Mraz song, only with a little more “oomph,” along with Demi Lovato’s generic vocals (she’s done better, too). Which likely means this will probably break him in the U.S. Which also means this is his least-compelling single by far. 
[3]

Tara Hillegeist: Olly Murs, perpetually as appetizing as a piece of burnt wheat toast left outside on a rainy day, nevertheless lucks into making the most compelling-sounding song in his career by playing Face/Off with the components of a contemporary One Direction single (he’s John Travolta, they’re Nicolas Cage, a comparison I’m making based entirely on how sympathetic I find their performative intensity; put another way, compared to the pub-Phoenix balancing act One Direction are trailblazing right now, he’s just a son of a Mumford) and grabbing a guest with more emotive range than his own; if the point was to make me mildly interested in a new Demi Lovato record, consider its mission accomplished.
[3]

Crystal Leww: Once I saw Carly Rae Jepsen open for Olly Murs. 50% of the crowd left when she was done. As soon as Demi’s part is over, I’m ready to make like that CRJ crowd and fuck off.
[2]

Anthony Easton: Demi just demolishes Olly, and the mutual begging is kind of hot, even if the lyrics are mostly sentimental drudge. 
[6]

Scott Mildenhall: Olly Murs is perhaps the one current popstar most likely to use the phrase “knees-up”, so it is appropriate that this very much is one: an old-fashioned duet with a practically wartime sentiment, between two people with a special connection (desire for further success in their partner’s market; not a euphemism). It’s very Eurovision, and a form that can delight with its unacknowledged silliness, but that form is barely filled. The two artists could have been drawn from one of Murs’ hats, and sound so. This should be about warmth, but simply sitting on the beach doesn’t guarantee sunshine.
[5]

Patrick St. Michel: It’s bringing me down. 
[1]