Wednesday, October 14th, 2009

Alien Beat Club – My Way

The runners-up in the Danish version of X Factor – why you shruggin’ for?…


Ian Mathers: Perfectly serviceable downcast almost-X-Factor-winning Danish pop, notably mainly for how brutally frank they are: “There ain’t no you, there ain’t no us, there ain’t no ‘maybe someday’/There ain’t no love, there ain’t no trust, this time I’m doing it my way.” Well gee, tell us how you really feel. If the music was less bland, this might actually be great instead of the good end of tolerable.

Martin Kavka: This wants to be a kinder, gentler breakup song: “if we can’t make it work, let’s part ways in peace.” But, on top of third-rate song arranging, it’s just another example of my most hated genre in pop: The Breakup Song In Which The Narrator Clearly Does Not Realize That S/he Was At Fault. After this relationship ends, “this time I’m getting it my way.” That’s a really dumb attitude to have in a relationship: no compromise, ever! Hope you enjoy being single.

Alex Ostroff: Lyrical subtleties suggest that this is a marriage – “Let’s dot our is and cross our final ts” is particularly evocative. The acknowledgement that “I don’t wanna try to make a change” is surprisingly mature, each accepting their own roles in the relationship’s end. But while this is pleasant, underneath the Stargate-by-the-numbers, there’s not much going on here. “We both know that, so why should we stay?” Exactly.

Martin Skidmore: Has any version of X Factor found a really good group yet? They’re decent but dull singers and the song is dreary; despite the classy Stargate production, this is a total bore.

Jessica Popper: I loved Alien Beat Club in Danish X Factor this year, thinking of them as a Danish Same Difference or a cheesier Alphabeat, so I was a bit disappointed that their debut single didn’t sound like a Cheiron cast-off from the 90s. However, I’ve since grown to love it as the sweet European R&B-pop song that it actually is, and I’m now quite excited to hear more from them.

Hillary Brown: Dudes, get a cup of coffee or something. It’s like “Umbrella” if you sucked the crazy out of it, which means it’s not much at all.

Michaelangelo Matos: Shamelessly raids every trick in the mod-radio hook book: piano intro, a hint of tremulousness to squeeze big-pop feeling out of totally ordinary words and vox, sprinkling of Autotune just to make it sound normal for the oh-nine, acoustic guitar via Sweden via Latin-pop, and a background “ooh!” that ties it all together and makes me keep pressing the left-arrow button despite myself. It’s also there to offset the “eh, eh, eh”s raided more shamelessly from Rihanna than everything else is from everyone else.

Pete Baran: I am unable to identify an alien beat in this song. Indeed, every beat, note and voice seems focus grouped (and automatically tweaked) to produce a song which ticks every box bar the “being any good” one. It’s a multi-cultural melange of pop, which proves the point that a great big melting pot just leaves everyone burnt. Oh Denmarkpaws.

Rodney J. Greene: Alien Beat Club doesn’t quite work as a name for them on account of they ain’t got no beats. Alien Tune Club wouldn’t work either. Nor would Alien Personality Club or Alien Idea Club. Matter of fact, even as Euros, they don’t sound particularly alien, either. I suggest they change their name to Paula DeAnda f/ Elliott Yamin.

Edward Okulicz: Very felt, if you class “simpering” as an emotion. This is a hollow concoction in the vein of what the Scandis write for the US markets for megabucks, and they probably had to give this one away.

Matt Cibula: I could see lots of Danish girls crying all night listening to this song and bemoaning the foul misdeeds of rotters named Karl or Joergen, and Danish girls need stuff to cry to too.

One Response to “Alien Beat Club – My Way”

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