So that’s three days in now, and we’re still waiting for something to score over six. I tried, dammit…

[Video][Myspace]
[5.70]

Alex Macpherson: It’s pretty hilarious that the latest iteration of dumb, route-one British commercial dance should be fingered as the specific sound of 2011. If you’ve heard Chase & Status or Rusko or Pendulum you’ll know exactly what Nero sound like — a kind of graceless lurch that tries to overwhelm you with force and bluster in lieu of any other positive qualities. For something so loud and brash, though, it leaves curiously little impression afterwards.
[4]

Jer Fairall: Delightfully maximalist in its approach, but those painfully generic vocals (and lyrics) nearly ruin the party by overstating what is already being communicated with the bluntest of force.
[6]

Zach Lyon: A delightfully stabby backing track marred by vocals that sound like what I imagine the “house vocals” tab in Garage Band would sound like.
[6]

Katherine St Asaph: First listen: “Hmm, so this is what Sleigh Bells would sound like if Alexis turned Rubyblue into a dance group first.” Second listen: “And if they added their old N64 and some bursting water pipes to the mix.” Third and subsequent listens: HOLY SHIT I HAVE MONSTER FISTS. BRB GONNA BEAT UP ALL THE THINGS.
[9]

W.B. Swygart: It’s a J-Pop song with all the Japanese lyrics taken out (“ARE YOU READY! DO YOU KNOW! FEEL IT TOO!”). It’s trying to shuffle on lino that’s had a few too many bottles of Smirnoff Ice spilt on it. It’s got a plodding, twisting heffalump of a riff that doesn’t sound like it was played on a keytar but sure as hell feels like it was. It reminds me that cold Cornish pasties were my favourite food when I was eight. Its only plausible dance routine basically involves repeatedly falling on your face then getting up again with a strained smile because you think you might have done your ankle BUT IT’S FINE. Or doing an impression of Jamie Foxx carrying far too many LPs in the video for “Slow Jamz”. It’s the soundtrack to a Pendulum lookalike competition. It’s got a bit in the video where the chief he-sprog spots the arcade machine has become unplugged, and, instead of plugging it back in again, tosses the plug on the floor like it’s a plate of sprouts BECAUSE CHASE & STATUS WOULDN’T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS SHIT. It’s completely minging, utterly adorable, and probably about 400% better than anything else they’ll ever put out.
[9]

John Seroff: As a whelp, I fell in love with a short lived tv show called Street Hawk, a blatant rip-off of Knight Rider where KITT was a non-talking, crime-fighting bike that maxed out at 300 miles an hour and featured a then unimaginably futuristic GPS. Tangerine Dream did the soundtrack and I was ten; it was like Shakespeare. Twenty-five years later, the show is unwatchable, the theme song sounds flat and trite and I’m just sort of sad that bad television is all I have to show as cherished childhood memories. I’m not sure how much all that has to do with “Me and You” but, between you and me, I think I preferred Tangerine Dream.
[4]

Martin Skidmore: This is another of the BBC’s list where the description of the act doesn’t seem to match what I am hearing. There is little hint of drum & bass or dubstep here, just big rock sounds with some electronics. The Alana vocal is pretty strong, but I kept hoping some energetic beats might rise up to take over from the power chords.
[4]

Anthony Easton: Me and You sort of sounds like Disco Feud, which is worth at least two points.
[2]

Tom Ewing: Mullet-rock, heavy on the keyboards, heavy everywhere to be frank. Idiotic but enjoyable, a more user-friendly take on the bludgeoning sound Daft Punk went after with “Human After All”. If we’re playing Sound of 2011 mix’n’match they should swap out the listless vocalist for Clare Maguire and get some real belting done. If we’re playing fantasy career paths then ….Plays The Scorpions would be my pick.
[7]

Kat Stevens: See, now if Nero had released “Me & You” around about this time last year then it would have been PERFECT for soundtracking ice hockey players crashing into each other and young Scandinavians hurtling down a mountain in shiny red lycra. Alas the next Winter Olympics (which will hilariously be held in the warm, sunny Russian seaside town of Sochi – average winter temperature 11C) isn’t until 2014, though I suppose that would allow the track an extra three years of build-up before the proper beat comes in.
[6]