The Singles Jukebox

If country music told you to jump off a bridge, would you do that too?

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[4.00]

Katie Gill: Are other genres of music so self-congratulatory and masturbatory as country music is? I’ll admit I don’t know much about jazz or reggae, do they have songs like this? Are there songs where someone sings about how ska music helped push them to a music career or how new age made them fall in love with a boy? Anyway, it’s a middle of the road song which is to be expected from a middle of the road subject.
[5]

Will Adams: The subtext being, “[The] Country Music [Industry] Made Me Do It [By Which I Mean Glorify The Genre In The Blandest Possible Way Thereby Ignoring All Of The Real Reasons People Love Country].”
[4]

Alfred Soto: Country music did not inspire these generic chord progressions.
[3]

Edward Okulicz: Though this country music wouldn’t make me turn the radio off, it also doesn’t make me want to turn up the volume and sing along, and that seems a little disappointing for a song about the power of the genre. The pat rhymes of the chorus torpedo the uplift the music strives for, not that it quite gets there either.
[4]

Jonathan Bradley: An earnest and accordingly plain mid-tempo account of effort and endurance, with none of the shit-kicking the title anticipates. (Imagine this title in Miranda Lambert’s hands.) Country music should make one do wilder things than this.
[5]

Alex Clifton: Soaring, but not really stirring; “My Church” did it better.
[4]

Katherine St Asaph: Patrick was nominated for Songwriter of the Year with co-writer Chad Kroeger at the 2016 Canadian Country Music Association Awards for her song “Bow Chicka Wow Wow.” Country music has some explaining to do. If not for that, then for this most “Drunk on a Plane,” “Drinkin’ Town with a Football Problem,” “Body Like a Back Road” gonzo-bro-country of titles attached to pat, premade Hobby-Lobby-stationery glurge. Like all glurge, it conceals a certain subtext; here, that the relationship metaphors she reaches for are a twinge controlling, that maybe country music steered her life straight into heartbreak. A story straight out of a country song, even.
[3]