We want what Carrie’s drinkin’.

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[6.62]Josh Langhoff: This kickass ode to the first sacrament stands astride the necks nexus of country, Broadway, and Christianity. “Something In the Water” bespeaks beauty and terror. It’s the superior sequel to “Somethin’ Bad,” with Underwood joined by two thirds of that song’s writing team, though with some minor alterations “Water” could close an act of Urinetown 2. If it were any less of a song, the strident edge on Underwood’s voice would sink it; she really Menzels the fuck outta some of these notes. But her song holds its own, summoning one deathless variety of American Christianity, the kind where you and Jesus know one another so intimately you might be sparring together on a wrestling mat, your match timed by an endless series of catastrophes.
[8]

Anthony Easton: Carrie Underwood singing Amazing Grace is a holy moment in pop music this year. She constructing that around a strong narrative, and a solid linguistic double meaning, integrates the vernacular potential of the hymn to the lived experience of the believer. This is a pretty American view of the world, but I keep wondering, if we don’t consider the wide range of popular music as we could–we talk about what’s on the radio, or the latest mix tape, but we don’t talk about the lullabies we sing to our kids, or the hymns we sing in church. The possibility of the later collapsing into the former, or the ability to talk about all kinds of populist discourses kind of excites me. Not as much as the genius, formal and technical skill it takes her to sing Amazing Grace–now that’s some Alison Kraus “Down to the River” shit, but both work in a similar, unironic way.
[10]

Brad Shoup: I took the confirmation class in fourth grade, but Paul’s reference in 1 Corinthians 11 to weak-minded believers falling ill after the Lord’s Supper freaked me out, and I re-took the class the next year. One Sunday, Pastor Ortega announced the names of the kids who were confirmed, and we walked up and affirmed a declaration of faith and — because this was a Presbyterian church, I guess — the pastor cupped his hand into a bowl and sprinkled water on our heads. I sat back down with my family, more relieved than anything. When we moved to Texas we switched to a non-denominational church that had a baptismal on a kind of balcony overlooking the pulpit. We never played “Amazing Grace” — there was no singing for this part — and while I often teared up, I mostly wondered how cool that water must feel. The racing pulse of “Something in the Water” is a foreign feeling to me, given the context; when I think of hymnody and water, I think of Gavin Bryars. I’ve always been attracted to faith that’s not performative and music that is, and I guess Underwood found one of my exceptions to the latter.
[4]

Micha Cavaseno: Carrie’s booming voice and the zeal of faith are a little too easy a match, and this song is painting-by-numbers and a bit too in a hurry to constantly hit THE BIG EXPLOSION OF GLORY. The weirdest part for me though is when I approach the end and she starts to adlib Amazing Grace, still at full-throttle, never willing to come down. Though I’ve never felt anything I could say was that same sort of breathless abandon for the people who throw themselves into water/God’s embrace, I don’t mock it. I’ve got envy, awe, and a bit of fear of it. Because if that gets you so loaded that you’re on this rush of manic energy like Carrie here, then how do you train your faith, restrain your faith, so that it’s cool and quiet? Or do you just explode all the time?
[5]

Edward Okulicz: Okay, it’s manipulative and tacky and overwhelming, but so what? Underwood sings like I’m not sure if she’s baptizing the song or drowning it, stuck between a few performance styles that usually make me feel nothing (talent shows, gospel, chest-out renditions of “The Star Spangled Banner”) but I loved when “Southern Comfort Zone” had that big, ridiculous choir of “Dixie” and damned if I’m going to praise that while slagging the exact same trick on a Carrie Underwood record. A country MOR power ballad Carrie Underwood record at that! My one objection, that the second syllable of “STRONGER!!!” should go up not down, was answered by the third go-around of the chorus. It’s a ready-made spectacle, completely detached from any reasonable idea of an artistic statement — as if she needs one post-Blown Away — and a perfect set-piece, ideal for TV promotional appearances in support of a greatest hits package.
[8]

Alfred Soto: I wish the rest had been “…(Does Not Compute),” as in the classic batshit Prince song. After the triumph of “Blown Away” this sounds equally beholden to elements, specifically of the earthquake variety. By the time it ends the church windows have blown out and the streets are flooded.
[4]

Thomas Inskeep: I can already picture the performance on this year’s CMA Awards, leading off the third hour of the show: Carrie Underwood, backed by a 40-member gospel choir singing “Amazing Grace,” maybe with old film running behind her, of Billy Sunday – or Billy Graham – performing baptisms in a river. Maybe Vince Gill will join her onstage. It’ll be the “emotional highlight” of the show. It’ll sell a lot of singles on iTunes. And it’ll be a showpiece, for certain. I just wish the song wasn’t such a boilerplate Christian A/C “anthem,” clearly meant to bookend her new hits collection with her first #1, “Jesus Take the Wheel.” This isn’t uplifting, it’s “uplifting.” Which means it’s Underwood giving in to her corn-poniest instincts, which is sad, because she’s smarter than this, as a myriad of her singles from “Before He Cheats” to “Blown Away” have exhibited.
[4]

Megan Harrington: This is too, too much. A born again bildungsroman, an immersion baptism, Carrie Underwood’s practically 10-second stretch of “stronger,” and most importantly, the lacy “Amazing Grace” outro — any one of these things would be enough to repel a listener with even the lightest concept of good taste. But I’m not that listener, I want to be practically tortured with constant blunt force. I want a song about, perhaps, the weightiest decision a person can make to sound heavy. This is not delicate, this is not pretty, this is not a fun, good time. It’s powerful.
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