Friday, January 13th, 2012

Wale ft. Miguel – Lotus Flower Bomb

First rap song about bath salts?


Pete Baran: Straight out of Christmas comes a decent slow lovin’ jam just in time for a filthy Valentines Day. Lovely seventies keyboard sounds. For a song named after something you can buy in Lush, it actually sounds like you might need to have a bath afterwards. But Wale himself: not helping.

Michaela Drapes: These unremarkable, ham-fisted rhymes from Wale (ugh, yes, we get it: you build intimacy through sex) are wasted on Miguel’s sleek throwback hook. Futhermore, if I were Viktor & Rolf, I’d sue.

John Seroff: A track this mellow puts all the weight of style on the rapper and Wale doesn’t do much with his showcase. I’d wager Twista or Common or TI or anyone with a definable style might’ve made something interesting out of this bolt of lace; Wale, on the other hand, leads with “you got that bomb pussy/I’m trying to detonate you”. Thanks, but no thanks. The generally underrated Miguel’s throwaway hook hasn’t much to offer either, though he at least gets an ill-advised, Prince homage “sounds of love” vowel recitation out of his system.

Alfred Soto: One of the rare tracks that gets worse as it inches forward — “shots with your flavor”? “destination to her thighs?” Worse, now it’s Miguel’s turn to get deputized and feminized for the Ne-Yo slot on a second-rate rapper’s valentine, and just like Ne-Yo he hovers, as uncertain as his relation to pitch.

Brad Shoup: “We way too young to know love,” says Wale. He’s 27. Then again, if he can’t pick a R&B singer who can carry a tune, maybe finding Mrs. Wale is too tall an order.

Andy Hutchins: Miguel’s hook has nothing to do with Wale’s verses, but the woozy keys have nothing to do with the synths that blip in and blip out or the drums that gallop in, so at least everyone’s agreed on being on different pages. Of the Songs For Women on Ambition, this isn’t either the best or worst.

Jonathan Bradley: Since hooking up with Maybach Music Group, Wale’s gone from one of rap’s more interesting artists into an unconvincing and unacknowledged parody of mainstream hip-hop’s dullest qualities. “Lotus Flower Bomb,” however, sounds less contrived than Wale has in a long time, and it has a delicious languid feel accentuated by Miguel’s sleepy hook. It’s a shame then that the rapping is so free of content, apparently inserted so the tune could be labeled a song, and not an instrumental. By the three minute mark, I’ve forgotten it’s still playing.

Alex Ostroff: I didn’t find the first half of Wale’s career makeover particularly convincing, and the “for the ladies” portion isn’t much better. Miguel carries the song’s mood; as for Wale, Kirko Bangz is probably more seductive, and he’s barely trying. (In fact, the sung “Ah! Oh! Ooh!” during the outro might retroactively disqualify Miguel’s choruses from being described as seductive.)

Katherine St Asaph: Miguel proffers finer-than-usual silk, and Wale stitches together his scraps, then closes his courting with this: “can’t decide if I came right.” That’s great, Wale. Keep backpedaling for that lunch date. And maybe take sex ed.

2 Responses to “Wale ft. Miguel – Lotus Flower Bomb”

  1. Oh, okay! I *thought* something weird happened to Wale. I wasn’t aware of his new affiliation.

    Also, not to quibble the point, but Lush doesn’t sell a Lotus Flower Bomb — unless it’s a retired item? I haven’t shopped there in a while, so … I could be wrong?

  2. Want this to be ruined even more? Miguel’s chorus sounds like “Come On Eileen.” As I just realized.