FACT: “When It’s Dark Out” and “The Beautiful and Damned” are two album titles by G-Eazy and not, like, Marilyn Manson…

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Katherine St Asaph: This Halloween season, remember that nothing is scarier than Cardi B learning that No. 1 hits are rewarded in this industry with guest spots on a G-Eazy song.
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Adaora Ede: And here we have two of the Three Stooges accompanied by a humble Musketeer of rhythmic urban radio. ASAP Rocky isn’t the first person I’d expect to lay down a tweetable, repeatable chorus for a rap hit in 2017, but then again, I don’t think he’s the first person I’d request to lay down any sort of verse in an era where the chic maladroit of Kanye and Kidz in the early 2010s has been replaced by gaudiness. I’m actually okay with the quietness of this song, but couldn’t this have been a 21 Savage track? Couldn’t Future have given us the mumbly lyrical finesse we so desire? Do white rappers just want to be clowned, or do they really think their Drake impressions are that on point? What could be better than “told that bitch to kick rocks, she act like it’s a boulder” or “hoe stirring up the pot, jambalaya”? The answer is Cardi B, who delivers Juicy J’s “Slob on My Knob” flow with the samey style that we’ve all come to know and fear.
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Ian Mathers: I dunno, I’m totally open to accusations that I don’t know shit about rap, but I do know whose verse I enjoyed the most here, and it was Cardi’s by a margin. No offense to the totally serviceable chorus and the decent other verses, but right now she just seems like the most compelling one of the three as a performer, you know?
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Julian Axelrod: There’s something thrilling about the follow-up — that moment when a new artist gets to step up and prove their big hit wasn’t a fluke. Cardi B makes a meal out of hers, displaying dazzling levels of charisma as she volleys zinger after zinger off Boi-1da’s echo chamber beat. (How long until “pussy poppin’ on the charts” replaces “going platinum” in the cultural vernacular?) But it’s a bummer she burned this killer verse on such a tepid single. G-Eazy’s lukewarm bravado and A$AP Rocky’s robotic hook feel especially hollow next to a supernova like Cardi. There’s a reason those guys don’t have a number one single.
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Ryo Miyauchi: G-Eazy shares roots in the Bay as does Master P’s empire, but can’t the guy do better service to the label than one bar of an overdone soldier reference if he’s going to prop No Limit as the title? It doesn’t help matters when Cardi B straight up raps in the “Slob on My Knob” flow and gives chorus duties to post-regional man ASAP Rocky. His footnote on Genius backs regional pride, but on a vaguely Southern beat also suffering an identity crisis.
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Stephen Eisermann: Egg on my face: I absolutely did not expect to like a G-Eazy song this much. This track is a certified banger, and although G-Eazy’s flow is confident and slick and Rocky’s hook is catchy as hell, Cardi far and away steals the show. Every track she hops on brings her closer and closer to having her big “Monster” feature.
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Will Adams: The best part about this is Cardi B rapping, “I might turn G-Eazy out” as if turning to camera, The Office style, and rolling her eyes in clear admission of being too good for his shit.
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Nortey Dowuona: G-Eazy is bland. Cardi B is really good. Rocky is boring.
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