The Singles Jukebox

Big in Europe. Very, very big in Europe…

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[2.23]

Michaelangelo Matos: It takes a lot to make me feel for 50 Cent.
[1]

John M. Cunningham: There’s a whole recent tradition, no doubt encouraged by mp3 blogs, of indie rockers covering hip-hop/chart-pop hits: the problem with most of them is that the performers can’t help winking at their audience, either by overemoting to lay bare the song’s ridiculousness or by keeping the arrangement at the level of a few tossed-off acoustic-guitar chords so no one thinks they’re really into it. Which is why Milow’s “Ayo Technology” is so refreshing. I’m not sure it really makes sense for a white Belgian dude to be singing lines like “Let’s get it poppin’, shawty,” but when he’s effectively transformed Timbaland’s 8-bit rave-up into a mournful folk-country song, replete with keening big-sky vocals and rootsy bottleneck guitar, you certainly can’t fault him for lack of commitment.
[7]

Alex Ostroff: The height of white-boy acoustic rap covers is and forever will be Ben Folds’ “Bitches Ain’t Shit”. All others are redundant. Milow’s voice during the verses sounds a little bit like Weird Al and communicates none of the lust, freakiness or desire of the lyrics, reducing the entire piece to inauthentic novelty. That said, the chorus transcends the shit surrounding it. Plaintive and hollow and needy and lonely, Milow sells “tired of using technology” in a way Justin never could.
[4]

Edward Okulicz: Exactly as awful as the original, just without the obfuscating production making you think there was something there. There wasn’t. There isn’t.
[1]

Martin Kavka: Like oh my like God don’t you see how like brilliant this is; if like Justin and 50 Cent are tired of using like technology, then it like makes total like sense to record like a cover that sounds like Jack Johnson like. It like brings like new meaning to crass like literalism, or something. It is like soooooo sensitive I like barely notice the pervy like sexism. I want to like sit on top of Milow!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[1]

Dave Moore: I had a conversation recently about the “death of irony” in cover songs, pointing to emo versions of hip-hop staples and David Cook doing Mariah. But here’s another fey indie singer/songwriter Dynamite Hack. The most I can say for it is that it’s not as bad as Dan Black.
[2]

Doug Robertson: “She wants it. She really wants it”, or so he reckons, at any rate. But, if she has even the most basic fundamentals of taste and common sense, she doesn’t, Milow, she really, really doesn’t. This is a greater Belgian crime than Tintin.
[3]

Rodney J. Greene: In the spirit of the song, the appropriate response to this is to smash one’s mp3 player against the sidewalk, then stomp on the broken pieces a couple times for good measure.
[1]

Additional Scores

Hillary Brown: [5]
Alex Macpherson: [1]
Ian Mathers: [0]
Martin Skidmore: [1]
Erika Villani: [2]