The Singles Jukebox

R Kelly, collaborating with a bloke called Da Juiceman – nope, no puns springing to mind here. None whatsoever…

[Video][Website]
[5.10]

Alex Macpherson: R Kelly sounds like anyone, OJ sounds like Gucci Mane and the beat sounds like a clubbier take on Young Dro’s “Clean With It”. These are all positives: there’s no denying the addictive potential of the crisp firecracker handclaps, quacking pinball synth or drums which cascade like a rocks tumbling down a mountainside.
[8]

Chuck Eddy: The nagging electronics in the background have plenty of boing. The equally nagging keep-up-with-Soulja Boy/Lil Wayne/whoever water torture up front gives me a headache. OJ Da Juiceman’s name makes me miss Oran “Juice” Jones.
[4]

Martin Skidmore: I guess if you are called Otis Williams, you have to come up with a pseudonym, since there have been two great singers of that name in earlier decades (no idea if he is related to either). It took me a long time to warm to R Kelly, but I’m a real fan by now, which is why this is disappointing: it sounds like an OJ single with R Kelly trying to join in by rapping much like him, which is a terrible waste of a great voice. OJ is OK, I guess, but it’s competently delivered drivel really.
[5]

Michaelangelo Matos: From The “Demo” Tape, the free mixtape/CD this comes from, I prefer the truly shameless “Banging the Headboard” (“sumptuous use of Autotune”–there’s four words I don’t normally type), but it’s understandable why this was the single. I just wish there were more R. on it and less OJ Da Juiceman, not to mention the trunk-slam snares and snap-py handclaps and one-note throwback synth-playing-person’s-voice line all seem to presage a far less mellifluous Kelly production style. This is cute, but let’s hope not.
[7]

Al Shipley: The same way that some journalists can lay claim to interviewing every president of an era, R. Kelly and Mary J. Blige are the two R&B standard-bearers that every ascendant rap star works with at one point or another. So why is R. fucking around with a C-list Gucci Mane sidekick on a lead single like he needs that clown to get on the radio at this point? Even if his career’s never been colder than it is now, nobody should ever be this desperate.
[2]

Alex Ostroff: I love R Kelly at his ridiculously smooth, awkward-analogied best. Rapping is not a good look for him. The less said about this the better… or so I thought. The handclaps and squelchy synth rip of Dirt Off Your Shoulders are annoyingly addictive, and this WILL be huge. This might not be what I wanted to hear from R., but Supaman High is bludgeoning me with its glorious idiocy, and I’m loving it more with every listen.
[7]

Ian Mathers: I have no idea how Kelly does it; before I heard this I was dreading the idea of him using the omnipresent AutoTune on one of his songs, but now I keep hearing “TH-TH-THUG!” on a loop in my head. And OJ Da Juiceman works similar magic – he should be annoying, but I’ve never heard anyone declaim “I can’t lie, I’ma ball til I die” with such infectious joie de vivre. The result is a song that in a single listen managed to go from grating to ingratiating.
[7]

Anthony Miccio: Acknowledging the disconcerting irony of R. Kelly’s recent fixation on vocal effects – acquitted of all charges and he’s suddenly uncomfortable in his own skin – this is some fine bubblegum snap. If I didn’t know this was some new hype rapping, I’d assume Kells and Flo-Rida had teamed up to steal Soulja Boy’s lunch money.
[7]

Fergal O’Reilly: The dumb hook runnning through this is far too annoying to carry the song, and by Kells’ recent standards it’s also disappointingly not batshit. OJ just kind of feels like he’s getting in the way and preventing him from cutting loose with the eccentricity.
[3]

Martin Kavka: This slice of grating egotism makes “Trapped In The Closet” seem like Ulysses.
[1]