The Singles Jukebox

Which one’s Floyd?

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[5.00]

Iain Mew: After a run of amazing singles that softly sneaked their way into being total earworms, the brash stomp of “The Boys” is a sharp contrast. It is effective in generating an attention-grabbing event single feel, which matches to the self-aggrandising lyrics (although it could be that they always were and I just didn’t realise). The problem is that there’s a lack of charm to the new approach and SNSD don’t quite manage enough punch to make up for it. Still, there’s a good melody, even if the best bit of it is from “Telephone”.
[5]

Katherine St Asaph: Military drums, pressurized verses and burrowing earworm of a title: good. “Piece of Me” staccato and squelch: better. Big-upping yourselves to a U.S. audience that hasn’t really been acquainted with you before this, instead of providing a proper chorus: why?
[5]

Edward Okulicz: SNSD’s attitude and sound could cross borders effortlessly with the right material, but this is less a full-on assault than a warning, as if to say “We’re SNSD and we’re going to crack your skulls with addictive TUNES OF DEATH,” only it’s all talk; they’ve dropped a slickly stuttering, perfectly serviceable but ordinary little R&B slink. It’s still got a fair bit of spunk and style, but there’s a big hole where the killer chorus is supposed to go.
[6]

Frank Kogan: Teddy Riley rhythm tracks sound more sculpted than played. If you insert a virtuoso genius like Michael Jackson or Spoonie Gee, the results can be starkly impressive (“impressive” a synonym for “somewhat boring”). No one who sings in Girls Generation is a virtuoso, but the girls toss great little pellets of harmony at us, and happily petulant-sounding rap chants. Kinda impressive.
[6]

Brad Shoup: That glistening demand: it’s like a call to sacrificial ritual. Otherwise, it’s a nice if thin club takeover song in the PCD mold, including an endearing slo-mo rap declaration. When it comes time to belt, though, why does Lee Soo Man sand the vox down with processing? Really, it may not be worth answering; there’s no coming all the way back from the “history/mystery” rhyme.
[6]

Alfred Soto: What prodigious energy: the Pussycat Dolls turn into “It Takes Two” (Rob Base, not Seduction) and back again. I don’t hear anything besides the pneumatic will to please endemic to award show presentations though. 
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